Human relations constitute the basic element of social life. It is inevitable to communicate with other people within the same society and to initiate and maintain various relationships. In order for interpersonal communication to be more healthy, we need to have certain characteristics as individuals. In communication, especially 'understanding the other person and understanding their feelings' are two of the most important elements.
20th century. Until the late 1900s, it was thought that the ability to recognize, understand and adapt was possible with the mental competence known as cognitive intelligence. However, the fact that different mental functions play a role in literature, art, relationship management and other similar fields has caused emotional intelligence to come to the fore.
Emotional intelligence is the ability of the individual to use emotions as a guide in achieving interpersonal effectiveness in his/her own environment. When we look at the communication style of individuals with high emotional intelligence, it is noted that they benefit from positive approaches and win-win strategies and that their empathy skills are highly developed.
One of the social institutions where interpersonal relationships are most intense is the institution of marriage. The pleasure and satisfaction gained from marriage is closely related to how much the spouses understand each other. Satisfaction and realization of expectations in marriage also ensures individual happiness. The factors that most affect satisfaction in marital life include age at marriage, financial situation, having or not having children, whether spouses come from the same socio-economic status, and the age difference between spouses. However, another point that is at least as effective as all these factors is 'peer-to-peer communication'. The communication styles of spouses and their efforts to understand each other and each other's feelings are related to 'emotional intelligence competencies'.
Emotional intelligence is related to the need for love, approval and acceptance, adapting to relationships, benefiting from relationships and establishing motivation-based commitments. It provides opportunities. In marriage, it is extremely important whether individuals have emotional intelligence competencies and the degree to which they can demonstrate these competencies to their spouses.
Of course, at this point it is impossible not to take into consideration the difference between genders. Women are more emotional than men They experience diversity more intensely and vividly. While women generally begin marriage prepared for the role of emotional manager, men begin with less acceptance of the importance of this role in maintaining a relationship. This changes both the meaning and the percentage of marital satisfaction between spouses.
Looking at the literature review in this field, we can say that there is a positive correlation between emotional intelligence and marital satisfaction. In other words, as the level of emotional intelligence increases, marital satisfaction also increases. In other words, if spouses have developed empathy, paid attention to understanding emotions, used correct and effective communication, and all these continue throughout their marriage, it means that they have reached the satisfaction and pleasure expected from marriage.
Finally, I would like to add that you should not consider marriage as a burden on yourself; Your expectations can only be met when you see it as 'common life, common sharing'. Let's learn to listen before judging, empathize before getting angry, and love before being loved.
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