While sexuality has an important place in the relationship between men and women and serves to increase relationship satisfaction, why are these desires blocked? What is low sexual desire? How often does it occur? What is the treatment?
Sexual reluctance
“I have a headache, I'm not in the mood.” Do such sentences have a significant place in your relationship? If constant rejection of sex, that is, lack of desire, has constantly taken over your life, you should not delay in seeking treatment.
Sexual reluctance can sometimes be against a partner and sometimes completely against sex. If there is sexual reluctance towards the partner, it is possible to talk about a relationship problem. For some couples, the problem of sexual reluctance towards their partner can be solved by adding spice to their sexual life. So the relationship needs some excitement. In some cases, the sexual desire rates of couples may not match each other. For one of the couples, sexual intercourse 2 days a week may be interpreted as sufficient, while for the other, this rate may be perceived as not having sexual intercourse at all. It is useful to consult a sexual therapist to plan the frequency of your sexual desire level for such situations.
In general, sexual reluctance is more common in women than in men. When this situation is evaluated for our country, the most common sexual dysfunction category among women is lack of sexual desire. However, it is not very common to seek treatment or see this condition as a problem. The main reason for this lies in having wrong beliefs about sexuality.
These wrong beliefs are based on the perspective that if sexuality is considered a right in our society, it is the right of men. The belief that men have the right to desire sexuality, enjoy it and reach satisfaction is a common perception that we encounter quite often. The effect of this false belief on women is that it creates a negative perception that sexuality is seen as a duty for women rather than a means of pleasure and satisfaction.
In the context of these, it is good for women in our society who want sexuality, enjoy it, have an orgasm and actively participate in lovemaking. Since the belief that it cannot be seen with the naked eye is widespread, a woman's request for sexuality can be considered shameful. Thus, the woman suppresses her own desires and remains reluctant to express them. In this case, the woman cannot discover her own sexuality and may experience sexual frigidity because she cannot understand sexuality.
Since the woman cannot clearly express her sexual desires to her partner, it is quite common for an intimate relationship between spouses to be prevented. Preventing this intimacy can cause the distance between spouses to increase. As long as the woman hesitates to express her own desires, she cannot achieve sexual satisfaction in the relationship and rejects sexual intercourse. The result of this is an increase in distance between spouses and sexual frigidity is inevitable. In addition, it is very difficult for women who experience sexual dissatisfaction to consult a therapist due to these false belief patterns that are widespread in our society. Women accept this situation and avoid making the necessary applications for help and prefer to live by interpreting the problem of sexual reluctance as fate.
Causes of Sexual Reluctance
Physiological Reasons: Aging, menopause, alcoholism, kidney Many physiological conditions such as liver and heart failure, thyroid diseases, chronic diseases such as diabetes and high blood pressure, multiple sclerosis, neurological problems, and vaginal infections can be listed. In addition, postpartum and breastfeeding periods and subsequent hormonal changes may cause sexual reluctance.
Psychological Reasons: Even if the level of sexual desire decreases with age, people may encounter this problem at any age. In addition, anxiety about feeling pain during intercourse, anxiety disorders, sexual incompatibility, cheating by your partner or your cheating, incompatibility and conflicts with your partner, communication problems with your partner, not being able to express your wishes, perceiving sexual intercourse as a crime, not being able to fully express yourself, Work-related stressors, changes in your partner's physical characteristics (for example, gaining too much weight), early or late ejaculation, erectile dysfunction in men, vaginismus, etc. There can be many reasons. Sexual reluctance is 99% affected by psychological factors.
; The main reason for reluctance should also be considered as couples having sexual intercourse focused on the vagina-penis junction. Here, couples feel negative emotions because they cannot enjoy touch, and sexual reluctance continues thereupon. Couples naturally reject sexual intercourse by responding to the relationship with anger or resentment.
Finally, the person's depression also causes sexual reluctance.
Treatment
We divide the causes of sexual reluctance into 2 groups: physiological and psychological. If there is no organic cause, that is, if no disorder due to physical factors is detected, the psychological help process begins. At this point, sexual therapy offers couples a more harmonious road map by investigating the foundations of sexual reluctance.
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