If you have an Addiction (Inability) schema, some of the following items will be very familiar to you:
DELIVERY COMMUNICATION
- Feelings – thoughts:
- I feel like I don't know what to do if something goes wrong.
- I worry a lot about problems that may arise.
- I can't take care of myself.
- I'm clumsy/ I am inadequate.
- I experience stress when making decisions.
- I experience stress when coping with daily tasks.
- I do not trust my own decisions.
- Behaviors – partners:
- I often get help and advice from people.
- I don't make a decision on my own, I seek guidance from others.
- I don't travel alone.
- I have a hard time managing my finances.
- My parent/wife handles most things for me.
- My parent/wife shows me what to do with each new step.
AVOID COMMUNICATION
- I always procrastinate on things like learning to drive, traveling, learning something new.
- I procrastinate/delay dealing with important tasks.
- I don't like changes in life.
COACHING OVER COMPENSATION
- I don't want anyone's help. I try to handle everything by myself.
- I must be self-sufficient.
- Even though I feel inadequate inside, I try to be enough for everything.
- I worry that I will be inadequate, that I will not be able to handle it on my own.
ORIGINS
If you have the Addiction (Disability) schema, some of the following childhood experiences may reflect you:
- My family did everything for me.
- My parents gave a lot of direction when I started a new job. (“Do this”, “Do this”)
- I hear a lot of things like “I told you so” when I made a mistake.
- I've heard a lot of things like "If you make a mistake, don't come to me".
- My parents used to warn of possible disasters. (“Be careful”, “It is dangerous there, don't go”, “It's deep there, don't swim there”)
- My mom/dad when I started a new job, he wouldn't be interested in what I was doing.
- My parents did not give me an idea about how to deal with the problems I was experiencing.
- When I was growing up, my parents were not with me or they did not guide me enough.
IMPACTS ON LIFE
- How does the Addiction (Disability) schema affect your life:
- You have no strength to endure stress .
- You are very worried. You are experiencing panic attacks.
- You are afraid of many places and crowds.
- You have various phobias.
- Your life is extremely restricted due to the precautions you take to protect yourself from phobias and dangers.
- Your spouse/lover is tired of taking on the role of your caregiver.
- You are deprived of the feeling of security that comes from standing on your feet.
- You can't spare enough time to have fun and relax.
- You may develop addictions such as alcohol addiction.
- You experience unnecessary stress because you are trying to do every job on your own without help.
Read: 0
