“The human mind is like a blank slate at birth.”
17. John Locke, one of the most important thinkers of the century.
Children are open to learning all kinds of behaviors. Children adopt negative habits and behaviors more easily than adults. They do not realize the negative behavior they perceive as entertainment. Appropriate guidance is of great importance in shaping the behavior of our children. Children's behavior; It is shaped according to the reactions they receive from their parents.
Determined ways to eliminate negative behavior are standard. However, every child and family is different, and behavior modification methods may vary from one child to another. It is important to review the psychobiological conditions of children that need to be met and to act accordingly. If these psychobiological needs are met, it may be helpful to make a plan to change negative behavior. Most parents do not know how to act when faced with such a situation. They cannot be sure whether to eliminate undesirable behavior by ignoring it or punishing it. What should we pay attention to in order to reduce or eliminate undesirable behaviors?
The following steps should be taken into consideration to change negative behaviors.
1.Negative behavior should be defined. If you see your child's negative behavior as an emotional or personality problem, you will attribute certain adjectives to him. For example; Adjectives such as "shy", "mother-dependent" "aggressive" may be perceived as an immutable characteristic of the child and may cause you not to make an effort to correct it. If you consider the problem as a child's behavior rather than a personal characteristic, you will take a step to change that behavior.
2. Children generally use crying and whining to get their parents to do something. However, parents should definitely not give up in the face of this situation. He should teach that you cannot achieve anything by crying. A child who gets what he wants by crying does not know that this is a negative behavior, on the contrary, he sees it as a way to get his wishes done. For this reason, the child must be taught that not everything he wants will be fulfilled when he cries.
3.Eb Parents should be patient. Do not argue with your child or scold your child. Take a break from your communication. When your child calms down, talk about the negative behavior. Do not end the time-out just because the child insists on it. If this happens, you will reward and reinforce the child's negative behavior. Saying that the child is a child and fulfilling every wish immediately will lead to serious problems for the child in the future. Therefore, families should teach their children to wait.
4.Be consistent after the word “no”. If you say "No" decisively and your child stops his negative behavior, immediately turn his attention to another direction. You should not repeat the word "No" frequently, as hearing the word "No" too often will cause your child to become desensitized. Also, you should not turn your "No" into "Yes" because your child whines. ,
Our aim is for our children to be individuals who have self-control, can make decisions on their own and bear the responsibilities of these decisions, and can express their feelings and thoughts. Correction of undesirable behaviors due to parental attitudes is possible with the common determination and consistency of the parents. You should remember that by acting consistently, calmly and determinedly, you will achieve your desired goal. The point to consider here is whether these behaviors occur after a certain psychological event. In such cases, parents need to get help from an expert. With early diagnosis and treatment of emotional disorders detected by the specialist, both the child and his/her parents will be able to control undesirable behaviors.
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