Uncontrolled use of technology by children has increased as children begin to learn and use it faster than their parents. Accordingly, the concerns of conscious mothers have also increased. His child may not be on the street, but at home and in front of him, next to him, but he does not know what he is doing with the tablet or phone in his hand, he is unaware of the content of the game he is playing...
What comes to your mind when you say "being a PARENT"? Is parenting the effort to feed, drink, clothe your child, send him to school, and help him get a good job?
The job does not end with just feeding the child and clothing him/her. Parenting is necessary to provide the child's basic needs, trust and unconditional love, and to raise self-confident and self-confident children.
The relationship between mother and child begins with the mother's pregnancy and continues when the baby opens its eyes to the world. From the first minutes of the child's birth, there is an interaction between parent and child. Children see the world through their parents' eyes. The people they take as models from the moment they first open their eyes to the world are their parents.
Freud states that personality develops between the ages of 0-6. During this age, the child is happiest spending time with his parents and interacting with them. He takes their behavior and speech as an example. How do they react to events, do they get angry at the slightest thing, how do they resolve events, how do they interact with other people? The child learns all these by observing. If your child has a behavior that you don't like, you should first review your own behavior!
It is inevitable for a child who grows up in an environment dominated by lies, violence or anger, due to his parents' wrong attitudes, to establish unhealthy relationships with his environment and family in his individual life. So, what are the attitudes of parents in the process of raising children?
Democratic parental attitude
In the democratic attitude, parents show unconditional love and respect to their children. The parents' attitudes towards the child are balanced and reassuring. When there is a problem, the problem is within the family. is spoken. However, the final decision is left to the child.
The child is given responsibility in accordance with his age and the parents supervise this. Parents always show their love for their children. The child is aware of this love and affection and knows that his family supports him. He can easily express his opinion on a subject.
A child whose opinions are valued and listened to by his parents does not hesitate to ask for help from his family when he encounters a problem. Because for him, family is the safest shelter.
Overprotective parental attitude
In overprotective parental attitude, there is too much intervention towards the child. Parents constantly try to protect the child from everything. Because he thinks that the child cannot make the right decision on his own, he constantly intervenes and wants to decide for his child.
Parents who act with this attitude want their children to be dependent on them and to fulfill the parents' wishes without questioning. Because they believe that they will make the best decision on behalf of their children.
Overly oppressive parental attitude
An overly oppressive parent always has a controlling attitude towards the child. He tries to impose his own wishes by force. He never takes the child's dreams, interests and wishes seriously and does not allow the child to realize them. Children of parents who behave in this way display aggressive and stubborn behavior in society.
Over-tolerant attitude
Parents who exhibit over-tolerant attitudes approve of all their children's wishes. They give. They do not go against their children's wishes, nor do they impose any restrictions. When children's demands are endless, parents' tolerance limits are eventually exceeded. This time, parents try to deal with their children by imposing strict punishments. Parents who display both tolerant and strict attitudes, even though they seek ways to cope in this way, cause confusion in children.
Indifferent parental attitude
Indifferent parents are those who do not set rules for their children, neglect their children, and do not provide their children with love and attention, which are their most basic needs. These are the couples who deprive the child. They express the reason why they cannot spare time for their children by giving excuses such as their busy working life. Because the child becomes a hindrance for them.
Children who grow up deprived of their parents' love and affection remain emotionally deficient even though they are physically adults. What is meant here is not that the parent cannot spare time for his child because of his work, but that he uses his work as an excuse for his lack of interest.
Inconsistent parental attitude
Parents' "unbalanced and indecisive" behaviors have a negative impact on the child's education and development. it will effect. Inconsistent parental attitude is generally when parents have different attitudes about an issue. When this happens, the child becomes confused and conflicted about which decision is the right one.
Perfectionist parental attitude
He is constantly criticized by his parents and is not loved or approved. The child, who sees that his needs such as receiving and being accepted are met only when he achieves success, has perfectionist characteristics.
What is digital parenting?
Parental behaviors and technology in today's world If we look at its contribution to this or what it takes from us, technology has become an integral part of our lives. While it offers convenience in many areas of life, the uncontrolled use of technology by children has increased as children begin to learn and use it faster than their parents. Accordingly, the concerns of conscious mothers have also increased. His child may not be on the street, but at home and in front of him, right next to him, but he does not know what he is doing with the tablet or phone in his hand, he is unaware of the content of the game he is playing...
On this issue, which can affect the mental and physical development of children in many ways, "parents' "The characteristics that children must have in order to be good guides in the digital world and to instill the correct use of technology in their children have created the concept of digital parenting." (Mahmut Yay)
What are the benefits of technology for children and young people?
It is used appropriately and correctly. Internet technologies offer many opportunities to children and young people. We can list these opportunities as follows: Providing easy access to many news and articles published at home and abroad, accessing many sites that provide foreign language education, improving language skills, making three-dimensional drawings and the opportunity to improve themselves in many areas through distance education...
Internet technology provides the opportunity to communicate and share via e-mail to a person who is difficult to reach in daily life. It is possible to extend the list above, but the important thing here is that parents guide their children correctly in appropriate and healthy internet use.
What are the risks that await children?
Just as you do not leave your child alone with a stranger or do not hand over your child to someone you do not know, you are in an endless, bottomless situation. Leaving children uncontrolled and uncontrolled in the well-like internet environment poses a great risk.
If we take a look at these risks...
Children may be exposed to some visuals in these environments for which they are not physically and mentally ready. . They can easily access sites that may negatively affect children, such as violent games and substance use. If no filter is used, some sudden advertisements increase children's exposure to negative content. In this way, children playing violent games at a young age increases the likelihood of them becoming individuals prone to violence later in life. As a result of the child communicating with people he/she does not know on the internet, it is inevitable that the child will develop false relationships that he thinks are friends or will be deceived, share some of his family information with strangers, and be exposed to events that have a traumatic effect on the person's life, such as harassment and abuse.
Parents should pay attention. The points that must be taken into account are as follows:
Personal information should not be shared with anyone; At this point, do not share your child's photos on social media!
Considering the child's age, you can restrict the time the child spends on the internet. Of course, when we impose restrictions on the child, if the phone does not fall out of our hands, the warning given is And do not expect the child to take the rules into account. Because children are disciplined through behavior, not words.
Since 0-2 years of age is a critical period for the brain development of babies, screen use by children before the age of two is harmful.
Since the use of screens and all kinds of games played in a way that disrupts the work and responsibilities of daily life for both adults and children will lead to addiction and also open the door to physical and psychological problems, this situation is called "problematic use". It is considered. In such a case, you can get help from the school counselor or an expert.
Cell phones, televisions and tablets should not be seen as babysitters. Making your child sit in front of a screen because they don't eat or stay still means hypnotizing them and isolating them from the real world.
Remember that you are a role model for your child in every aspect; If your child sees that you do not put down these tools, he may think that this is normal. While reading books, allow him/her to see you respecting the elders and showing love and compassion to the younger ones and taking him/her as an example.
Remember, the kind of individual your child will become in the future is hidden in the foundations laid when he/she was young. Don't let technology manage you, you manage technology!
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