If you have a Failure to Achieve chart, many of the following items will be familiar to you:
DELIVERY SUCCESS
- I don't work hard enough because I already have I will fail.
- I fulfill my duties reluctantly and haphazardly.
- I fail when I look at my peers (in career, money, status, school, sports). / Everyone around me seems to be more talented than me.
- I don't have what it takes to be successful in life. / I don't believe I can succeed.
- I can't achieve what other people can achieve.
- I'm stupid/incompetent/incompetent/failed.
- I feel dishonest at work (everyone thinks I'm competent, but I'm actually not as competent as they think.)
- I have to work harder than other people to achieve the same things.
- I am ashamed of where I am in life.
- Sorry for my failure.
AVOID COMMUNICATION
- I procrastinate my work all the time.
- I avoid work difficulties.
- I try so that my failure is not exposed.
- I experience reluctance and laziness when starting work.
- I am often afraid of failing in the jobs I will enter.
COACHING OVERCOMPENSE
- I strive to be very successful.
- I try to look very successful/capable.
- I work so hard that I am tired all the time.
- I just can't relax.
ORIGINS
- If you have the failure schema, some of the following childhood experiences may reflect you:
- Your efforts as a child, your achievements were not appreciated.
- As a child, your efforts and achievements were mocked and criticized.
- Your parent would say that you didn't believe you could succeed (“Nothing will happen to you”).
- You grew up in a violent family environment (neglect and abuse).
- Insufficient Self-Control schema could be another origin. You can take a look at this schematic page.
IMPACTS ON LIFE
- How does the failure schema affect your life:
- You can't see if you can really succeed because you're procrastinating.
- You suffer from chronic fatigue because you try too hard to overcompensate for your sense of failure.
- You are constantly unhappy and hopeless because you see yourself as a failed, incapable person. You may experience depression.
- You don't take the necessary steps to be successful and you really fail in the end.
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