If you were born between the years 70-90, you are an investigative person and if you are a mother now, welcome to an anxious journey. This is a thorny road. This generation is a generation that tries to heal the wounds of its own childhood and does this mostly through the child it has. A group that hears the word "trauma" a lot, can say "I have traumas" and burns itself out so that "my child does not have trauma". A generation stuck in between. A generation that serves as a bridge from the old to the new, has tasted the old and is trying to keep up with the new. It focuses on both itself, the past and the future.
High awareness makes the mother tired in this period. As soon as they have a child, they are aware that the feelings that go through them come from their own roots, and feet wander somewhere between what should be sincere and what they should be. Sometimes it's him, sometimes it's the other. The mother, who cannot do what she should, puts on the “guilt” costume. While he tries to make up for his shortcomings by building a perfect individual, he beats himself up saying "it happened because of me". Then he immerses himself in books, experts, social media accounts. He is doing his best to make up for the shortcomings. But in vain, because the being in her hand is something bloody, alive, thinking, having feelings and reactions.
What can this mother do to get rid of this nightmare?
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From the word trauma Don't be so scared. There's a concept called post-traumatic growth, have you ever heard of it?
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Don't hold yourself accountable for everything that happens.
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Remind yourself with compassion that you can make mistakes.
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I'm human, I may have made a mistake, now think about what I can do better
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Read your child's statements well.
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See the child as an individual independent of you, only dependent on you for a certain period of time.
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Imagine if you might have chosen him as your savior.
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Be attached to your child, but try to notice if you have an addicted side.
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Remember that everyone is unique.
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Don't compare yourself to other mothers.
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Regain the strength you lost when you couldn't, by realizing what you can do look to win...
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