Unfortunately, there is no rule that every marriage will be happy. Divorce is as natural as getting married. A happy and peaceful separation, rather than an unhappy union, is the healthiest for both parties.
So what happens to the children in this case? If there is a civil separation and this separation continues in a civilized manner and the parents fulfill their responsibilities, the children come out of this situation with as little damage as possible.
Of course, there are traumas they experience. At first, they can often see themselves as the reason for this separation. Their fear of losing their mother or father completely pushes them to unhappiness. It is necessary to communicate with children as much as possible before and after the divorce and prepare them for this situation.
Whoever gets custody after the divorce can use their child as leverage for the other party. 'custody' does not mean 'I have the power, now you are in my hands, you will beg me to see your child'. Many may say 'she doesn't deserve to see her child'. According to what and according to whom? What is important here is your ego or your children growing up as healthy individuals? You couldn't make your marriage work and you decided to separate in order to be happy and peaceful. How much right do you have to leave your child alone?
There is also a method of punishing the other party, which is usually fathers. 'Let them stay without me for a while and come to their senses. I can't take responsibility for children or anything like that, let them see what they want. ' model. It's a situation of leaving the children alone, financially and spiritually... Maybe once a month or a year, the children come. Maybe it never comes. You are divorcing your spouse, not your children!
You are adults. If you try to carry out your duties more carefully after the divorce so that your children can grow up in a healthy way, they will experience less trauma.
You can get help from a psychologist when you think you are not enough on your own.
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