Now let's do a dream exercise.. Imagine that you open your eyes one morning and you have no idea who you are or where you are. There are sound objects around you that move much bigger than you, but you don't understand them, you don't know their language. Everything is many times bigger than you. Everything your eyes see, your ears hear, your nose smells, your tongue tastes, everything you touch and touch is foreign. What do you feel?
Fear? Anxiety? Curiosity?
Welcome to the world..
Children come to this foreign world without the knowledge and skills to survive. The most important institution where people can learn this knowledge and skills and get answers to their search for security is the family. When the emotional, cognitive and behavioral needs of the child are not met during the development process, negative behaviors can develop. Consistent behavior within the family and positive relationships with the child are important for the positive development of the child. Parents' establishing a warm relationship with the child, their accepting attitudes and meeting their emotional needs prevent the child from exhibiting problematic behavior and improve problem-solving skills.
Hard discipline, lack of social and emotional support for the child, limitlessness, divorce and death of one of the parents. Reasons such as absence for various reasons, the father's inability to show his attention and love, failure to establish healthy communication with the child, domestic violence, can intensify feelings of restlessness, fear, anxiety, anger in children and cause problematic behaviors such as aggression and outbursts of anger.
We can list the most common behavioral problems in children that are not appropriate for their developmental period as follows; Aggressive behaviors (pushing, hitting), lying, taking things without permission, excessive fear and anxiety, nail biting, hair pulling, thumb sucking, bedwetting and fecal incontinence, eating disorder, defiance, sleep disorders.
Some of the reasons why the child exhibits problematic behavior; the desire to be noticed by their parents, the need to be seen and approved, not knowing how to express their anger in a healthier way, their parents modeling their negative behaviors, genetics The reasons are physiological problems and reward of behavior by parents without realizing it.
When parents cannot meet children's physical and emotional needs in appropriate ways, children may exhibit negative behaviors to make themselves noticed. At this point, while searching for the source of the problem behavior, it is necessary to observe how often and how intensely the child exhibits the behavior. The first role model for the child is the parents, and parents should also observe their own attitudes and behaviors at home.
In addition, allowing children to express their emotions freely, setting clear (not hard) boundaries that the child can understand, showing that he/she is loved. It is in the child's ability to express compassion and affection both verbally and through body language, to speak in simple sentences that he can understand in his quiet time, to give him responsibilities appropriate to his age, to reward his positive behaviors (praising, being happy, thanking, expressing that he is happy, etc.), to reinforce his creativity, to avoid comparisons. It will help eliminate behavioral problems.
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