"Man is born twice. One is to be born from the mother, and the other is to be born from oneself. We said that the main thing is to realize the second “birth”. Let's continue from where we left off yesterday… In order to be born by yourself, it is necessary to be a child who is “fed” with pedagogical approaches since infancy, whose curiosity drive is not dampened, and who is not afraid of questioning.
However, some people cannot be born from themselves. Just as there is a need for nutrition and conditions free from threats that allow the healthy development of the fetus in order for every biological birth to take place in a healthy way, there is a need to be a child who is "nurtured" with pedagogical approaches since infancy, whose curiosity drive is not blunted, whose ability to take responsibility for his behaviors is developed, and who is not afraid of questioning, in order to be born himself. there is. Otherwise, the individual cannot question his life and what he has been taught until adolescence, whether a dress that is worn without his consent is suitable for him. If he cannot question, he is born either "crippled" or "dead". That's when the question we asked above finds its place once again: Do you really live?
If we continue to explain the concepts of finding yourself (constructing your identity) and creating the meaning of your existence with the metaphor of "dress"; some people find the clothes made for them by their environment tight. They try to get out of that jam by tearing it from the right and the left. But since they do not have the opportunity to throw away the dress completely and make a new one for themselves, this dress prevents them from acting freely. This can make the person look clumsy or shabby. The most typical example of this is the suburban lifestyle, which is based on modern city life on one side and village culture on the other, but is a "transitional culture" unlike either.
WHAT DO MOTHERS AND FATHERS DO TO THE CHILD?
When we look at the common parental attitudes in raising children in our country, do we see an approach that lays the groundwork for people to find themselves? I can hear your answer: No, unfortunately not. Absolute obedience under threat of punishment and force from the child. We are talking about an attitude that does not allow communication with the child on an equal level, regards the unquestionable fulfillment of parental wishes as a measure of respect, and does not tolerate objections, expressing and experiencing their own wishes. Of course, this approach is dominated by fear, anxiety and silence, not asking questions.
Another mistake is the "overprotective" parenting attitude. This kind of parenting approach, which puts its own anxieties on the child while saying that I will raise a “good child”, is more common in people with mental problems or with a relatively higher education level. upbringing style. This is an approach that can be considered as an ideal formula for raising individuals who are sloppy, incompatible with society, who are unlikely to know themselves, and who have mental problems.
MEET IN HUMANITY….
In the process of searching for the meaning of human life, while constructing his own identity, the national, religious, political, economic, professional, ethnic, etc. of the society he is in. are directed to live in accordance with value judgments. This way of life creates a "clothed identity", a dress cut by others. However, religious, national, professional etc. There is only one common identity under our identities: Human identity! We can all get rid of these "clothed identities" that distance us from being ourselves and become infected with the common denominators of the human family. But the condition of reaching this level is to come to terms with "others who have built a nest" in us and to be liberated from their influence that keeps us from ourselves.
We are the work and carrier of the heritage of humanity in the broadest sense. If you do not understand what the bonds between this legacy and your being are and how they affect you, you will not be able to make them serve your birth. Either you remain a prisoner of this legacy or you become the architect of a meaningful existence by using all your means. The choice is yours!
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