Is happiness a coincidence or a choice? Is it known from birth or is it learned later? Is it continuous or intermittent? What exactly is happiness?
Happiness, in its most well-known definition, is a state of satisfaction arising from the individual reaching what he needs and wants. The result of one's action is the reward of one's desire. In other words, it is the ratio between what we desire and what we achieve.
Some studies say that people's innate liking for the taste of sugary foods stems from their instinctive search for happiness. Serotonin, a brain chemical known as the happiness hormone, is a neurotransmitter that can be affected by nutrition, and its release is associated with sugar consumption. Based on this clue, we come into the world with the motivation to be happy. According to another approach, we learn everything in life, including emotions, by seeing or experiencing. In other words, if the environment and family we are born into are happy, we learn to be happy from them, otherwise we learn to be unhappy. We accept being happy as a positive value and strive to achieve the states of happiness we have acquired through our experiences.
Many people have patterns of happiness in their minds that have existed since childhood. Happiness is determined by judgments about what conditions, whatever happens, and how long it takes to be happy. If what is happening fits the pattern, happiness is achieved; if it does not (considering that these patterns are expectations created by what we witness, hear, watch and imagine, they may not fit), we are unhappy. Sometimes we overlook the happiness we experience and do not realize it just because it does not fit the template in our mind. I think it would not be wrong to say that the biggest obstacle between people and happiness is their own definition of happiness.
Is it possible to define happiness as "the state of not being unhappy" or "satisfaction with life in general"? Why not! The increasing prevalence of individualism and the imposition of "demand" and "72 ways to happiness" from all corners of popular culture have begun to make the individual perceive being happy as an obligation, not a desire. Constantly underlining that happiness is an extraordinary state and that the purpose of life is to make these moments uninterrupted has made people constantly run for happiness. Happiness in one's life It began to be perceived as a necessary part of one's self-perception, rather than expressing a positive value in the aggregate. However, couldn't being considered happy even not being unhappy be a reason in itself?
However, we harbor many emotions within us: excitement, fear, hope, disappointment... Negative emotions are also inevitable and valuable in our lives. A healthy individual aspires only to the positive emotions and does not try to avoid others. Every experience and emotion we experience, whether positive or negative, is valuable for our personal development. Rejecting our negative emotions and experiences will leave us incomplete. We become complete only when we mourn a loss, when we regret a mistake, when we feel the sadness of our loved ones within ourselves. Should being completed make us unhappy?
The new year can be a good opportunity to make new resolutions, make new beginnings and be happy. So what is the formula for happiness? How can we be happy? I think we need to start by defining happiness correctly. Happiness is not just an impulse within us, it also includes what we learn throughout life. Even if we don't know how to be happy yet, that doesn't mean we can't learn. Most importantly, happiness depends on our definitions of happiness. Definitions that are far from reality and have high expectations do not lead us to greater happiness, on the contrary, they take away our option to be happy. When we find happiness, we should consider that it will not last forever, that it will fade after a while, like all emotions, and enjoy the happy moments. And when we are unhappy, we should calmly wait for the next happy moment with the gains we get from this feeling.
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