In Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, our thoughts are focused on. By working on our thoughts, we aim to be able to experience the emotions that burden us in a healthy way. Thoughts affect our emotions, and these two components affect our behavior. We can achieve the changes we want in our lives by changing the structure of our thoughts.
So what structural defects in our thoughts hold us back in life? Does it cause emotional burdens that we don't want to carry? What powers our obsessive thoughts? Let's examine it item by item.
o Arbitrary inference,is the development of our attitude towards the events without any evidence, or our thinking in the exact opposite way even though the evidence says the opposite. Like when I think that my boss is not satisfied with me despite the positive feedback he gives about my performance.
o Selective Abstraction,Judgement of the experienced situation or context with a single detail, without seeing its general features, even though there are other, more specific details. An example of this would be that the table decoration at my wedding was not done the way I wanted and although the wedding was very enjoyable, I thought that my wedding was ruined because of the decoration.
o Thinking in an all or nothing way,evaluating life with two opposite poles such as black and white; A thing either exists completely or does not exist; An option between these two is not considered. The reason why I think the food I cook is a disgrace when it tastes perfect but has just a little too much salt comes from this kind of mindset.
o Reading/catastrophizing the future, constantly making negative predictions about the future. It's like thinking that if I get a below average grade on an exam, I will fail that course.
o Emotional inference,when a person evaluates situations according to what he believes and feels and ignores the facts, even though there is contrary evidence regarding an event. Ignoring the pleasant times we spend with my wife and thinking that she is bored with me because of my beliefs that I am a boring person.
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o Underestimation or exaggeration,underestimating one's achievements and exaggerating one's mistakes. An example of this is that I don't think it's important that I finished the department in second place, and that I see myself as a failure because I didn't come first.
o Mind reading,predicting the thoughts of the other person without communicating. Like my date, who didn't call me that day after the date, thinking that she didn't like me, so I didn't take any steps to talk to her.
o Overgeneralization, Coming to general judgments by combining results from a single or several events. An example of this is that after a few moments of conflict with my close friend, I thought that no one understood me and that I could not communicate.
o Personification,the person's interpretation of events that are not related to him or that concern him little, through himself. After I noticed that my cat had lost its appetite, I started to think that I was a bad owner and that I didn't play with it enough.
o should, should expressions, having definite judgments about one's own and others' behaviors and attitudes. Absolutely no bending of the rules is allowed. Like when I think, 'My roommate must definitely cook the meal when it's his turn.'
o What if?The person constantly asks himself questions such as 'what if'. “What if I don't graduate?”, “What if I'm late for my doctor's appointment?” like.
Do any of these thought types sound familiar to you? So, what did you think while reading the explanations and examples? Imagine a close friend of yours living his life with distorted thoughts. For example, how does that sound if you say you were late for a meeting for a valid reason, but he/she thinks you're late because you don't like him/her?
Distorted thoughts cause us to see life from a limited and erroneous perspective, while negative thoughts It affects us being influenced by our emotions and communicating effectively. If you wish, you can reduce the negative effects of distorted thoughts on you with a little practice. What you do is to recognize the distorted thoughts you have and derive alternative realistic thoughts. For example, after calling myself "idiot" when I forgot the key at home, I remind myself that this is a situation that can happen to anyone and does not require a label. If you do this exercise by writing it down and doing it regularly, there will be a positive and realistic development in your thoughts. If you think that you are heavily influenced by distorted thoughts, that they greatly affect your daily life, and you wonder where the source of these thoughts comes from, you can fight these thoughts more effectively by getting support from a mental health professional.
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