Today, the expectations of a person from the other side, whether male or female, are increasing. Increasing personal expectations, sexual desires and wanting to be happy all the time are the main problems that lead couples to therapy.
When can couples therapy be applied?
- Relationship and communication problems with partner,
- sexual problems,
- depression, anxiety or anxiety disorders that develop later in one or both of the couples,
- reflection of childhood problems on the couple's relationship
- alcohol or substance addictions,
- eating disorders, emotional abuse,
- neglect and violence, the problems of the parties with their families,
- emotional and emotional problems such as living a healthy separation process Couples therapy can be applied for psychological needs. Couples therapy, family therapy or relationship therapy are similar concepts, their goals are the same.
What should be the purpose when coming to couples therapy?
The main goal in couple therapy is to strengthen couples' relationships with each other. and to support themselves in developing themselves.
No relationship is one-sided, it means I have as many problems as my partner has. But often couples come to therapy to blame the other and put the blame on the other. The main goal is for both parties to focus on their own contribution to the problems in the relationship. As the parties focus on the reflections of their own disorders in the relationship, individual therapy should support couples therapy.
In the process of couples therapy, the focus is primarily on healthy communication skills, which includes understanding the feelings of the parties and expressing them in a neutral way. Talking about negative feelings and expressing them in a neutral way is part of couples therapy.
The goal in couple therapy is not to keep couples together. Couples can continue the relationship or break up. The main goal of therapy Although couples hold the other person responsible for the problems they experience, the main reason is that both parties try to treat their childhood traumas or missing issues by reflecting on the other. What is done in couple therapy is to reveal the relationship between the current problems of couples and their childhood experiences.
Couples sometimes they may not know what to expect from rapid, it is important to see and interpret this as a therapist.
Why does couple therapy not progress?
If one or both couples does not want to change internally,
Therapy will not progress if one or both of the couples have ended the relationship internally.
If it is result-oriented instead of process-oriented, therapy may not progress, the purpose here is for the person to make discoveries about himself in the process and take steps for change.
Some problems are solved in a short time. It may be necessary to work for years to solve some problems.
How does the process go?
It can be started with one or two sessions a week at the beginning. In the sessions, each party sets its own agenda and the effect of these agendas on the parties can be examined. In this sense, psycho-education is provided along with various practices in the session during the process.
After a few sessions, individual therapy is required as well as couple therapy. Individual therapy with one couple, one woman and one man per week is generally preferred. If one of the couples quits therapy, the therapy process can continue if we are individual with the remaining partner. In the process, the frequency of couples therapy sessions decreases and the therapy turns to individual therapy. Because the problems experienced by the couples are nothing but the reflection of the individual problems of the parties to each other.
What are the Problems the Couples Experience?
Sometimes the marriage experienced may not be the marriage of the couple, but the marriage of the families and the environment. They may have difficulties in not being able to set boundaries and taking responsibility.
Isolation problems,
The most common problems are that couples put each other in the role of childhood caregivers and unconsciously repeat the problems they had with these caregivers in their childhood in adult relationships.
Couples parenting each other,
Sometimes one couple parent the other. In such a case, they continue the relationship as mother-child or father-child. Sometimes couples parent each other. Sometimes, both parties take the child role and continue the relationship in these roles. In this case, the couple's sexual
Cultural structure and modern structure conflicts are another problem.
How is a healthy relationship?
In some relationships, couples never criticize each other, they always They want to keep it at "fine". This is not realistic. A healthy relationship is not a conflict-free relationship. If there is no conflict between couples, it is problematic.
The real and healthy parties are able to see both positive and negative sides of each other and express them in a neutral way. The person may want his partner to think, speak and act as he wishes. This is a disorder. The healthy thing is to adapt to each other from time to time and to tolerate disagreement/emotion from time to time.
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