Responsibility means being aware of fulfilling our duties and obligations towards ourselves and our environment
on time. The biggest responsibility in creating awareness of responsibility falls on parents, as in every stage of child development. The development of responsibility that begins within the family
shapes children's entire lives; It enables them to socialize and develop as self-confident individuals. Children who grow up with a sense of responsibility are more successful and happier at every point of their lives. Therefore, every parent should do their best to make their children responsible. So how can we help these children gain responsibility?
Know Your Child..
In order to give appropriate responsibilities to your child; You need to know the characteristics of the developmental period your child is in and have information about his/her personal characteristics. You can support the development of awareness of responsibility by observing your child's feelings and thoughts, abilities, circle of friends, and the aspects of his/her deficiencies and by being aware of it and giving appropriate responsibilities to your child.
Be a Role Model for your child.
You should not wait for your child to start school or reach a certain age
to feel responsible. You should start giving the sense of responsibility at an early age by being a role model. Starting from an early age, your child If you support your child by giving him small responsibilities appropriate to his development, you will also support your child's abilities and his feeling of being able to do it. By being a role model, you will reinforce your child's sense of responsibility. Because children tend to observe and copy everything you do. You should be a good role model at this point while giving your child responsibilities appropriate to his development. In addition to encouraging him to fulfill his responsibilities, giving positive feedback to your child as he fulfills his responsibilities is important for taking responsibility. It is an attitude.
Support the Development of Self-Confidence..
It is absolutely necessary to develop your child's self-confidence in order to gain a sense of responsibility.
As a parent, be aware or The words you say and the actions you take are effective in developing your child's self-confidence. r is the dot. If you think that you are doing your child a favor by doing things that your child can easily do by saying things like "I'll do it, I'll dress it, did you want water?" instead of supporting and improving its development, you are wrong.
However, by making a comparison, you can also say that your child's Comparing yourself with your peers and friends with words such as 'I motivate you' shakes your child's self-confidence. The child who feels inadequate will not only feel anger towards the person you compare him to, but will also believe that he must be in competition with someone who is not aware of his own abilities. Thus, he will feel responsible. You will prevent the development of the feeling of self-confidence, which is the basis of the child's emotional state. You should approach your child with the awareness that he is special and unique and that he has his own characteristics.
Know that your child has the right to choose..
Not only children, but all of us as individuals, embrace the situations in which we can make choices and take action with higher motivation. Because making choices is important in terms of motivation and adoption. When others make choices on our behalf in the face of situations, that choice becomes a 'job / job' 'task' but when we make our own choices, we see it as a 'problem that needs to be solved'. Since our own choices are always more motivating, we try to solve them with an internal responsibility. If you offer options as your child's choice, you will increase your child's motivation and internalize the sense of responsibility.
Review Your Family Structure..
The most important point of helping your child gain responsibility is You need to know your family structure. If your family structure is inconsistent, you cannot teach your child the sense of responsibility. Because in inconsistent family structures, there are no family rules and habits anyway, and children will learn the structure of uncertainty. Because every child is the mirror of their family. Children will not develop in a different way than the family structure you have adopted.
Give responsibility to the child To make people believe, it is necessary to have a democratic family structure. In order to have a democratic family structure, parents need to clearly draw the boundaries at home. In family structures where rules, routines and consistent behaviors exist, order is established and responsibilities are implemented by family members. In democratic families with clear boundaries, you give the child autonomy by giving him the right to choose within the boundaries. The boundaries are clear. Children feel safe in families where they have a democratic attitude. When they have the right to choose with your democratic attitude, they develop as self-confident and self-aware individuals. In families with this structure, children are not afraid of their parents, know that they will accept no matter what and know that they will not be judged, so they do things secretly. The parent-child relationship, where family ties are strong, develops before entering the family.
Don't solve your child's problems..
Giving your child a sense of responsibility is only about their physical abilities
is not possible. Your child's awareness of responsibility is also important in accepting the consequences of the decisions he makes. While we instill responsibility awareness in order to play games in harmony with his friends and to gain the necessary skills to comply with school rules, we are actually preparing our child for social life. Because when he is in social life individually, The ability to solve a problem it encounters and solve it comes with the acquisition of responsibility awareness within the family. Being able to solve the problems it encounters in social life on its own, accepting the consequences of its behavior, and acting with awareness of its own feelings and needs enables your child to develop as a healthy and happy individual. Parents who take it upon themselves to take their children's problems and solve them as their own responsibility
Parents who do not give their children responsibilities cause their children to feel inadequate and powerless in social life. For example, homework is your child's responsibility and your child should take the responsibility for not doing his homework, not you. Here, the child who does not do homework is the one who does his homework. Instead of making the child's life easier, parents make it completely difficult. Because the child is not dependent on his parents. They learn to be dependent individuals. They develop as individuals who cannot solve their own problems in social life.
For this reason, parents should ensure the development of awareness of responsibility by giving their children responsibilities appropriate to the child's development from a young age
and by setting an example for the child. Acquisition of responsibility is a slow-developing and It is an area of achievement that must be progressed consistently. Therefore, it is important not to expect rapid development and to have a constantly supportive attitude.
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