When most people think of responsibility, they think of duties towards someone else. However, "one's responsibility to live well", which is the first and most important responsibility of human beings, is not among those that come to mind.
"First me, then someone else" should become a motto for the person to realize his responsibilities towards himself. Although this motto may sound selfish, it is a fact that in order to be good to someone else, one must first be good to oneself. Calling this motto a selfish approach and adopting the principle of “someone else first, then me” is an escape hatch used to ignore one's responsibilities towards oneself; In other words, it is irresponsibility.
Trying to erase himself from the world by not undertaking any social action and believing that he cannot succeed is the attitude of a person who thinks that others are more valuable than himself. Valuing someone else more than ourselves means not knowing that valuing oneself is actually a responsibility towards ourselves.
There is a fact we all know that it is easier to take on someone else's responsibility than to take on our own. Isn't it always easier to ask someone for our friend than to ask someone for ourselves? Engin Gençtan says that people's desire to ignore their own responsibilities is the result of a flawed behavior learned in childhood.
Parents who surprise their children with their whims and excessive expectations literally brainwash the child about how selfless people they are in order to compensate for the guilt they experience. The number of parents who try to put the responsibility of having an unhappy marriage on their children is not small. A person who grows up in such conditions may show attitudes similar to those of his parents in later life. It cannot be an acceptable fact that a person who cannot manage to survive blames his relatives on his relatives.
Although retrospective scenarios such as "If my father had not been like this..." or scenarios to avoid responsibility regarding the past such as "If my husband had not been like this..." are frequently used. It cannot completely eliminate the person's feelings of guilt towards himself. “Things like this always find me” or “See what's happening to me again?” “di!” In other words, the concepts of fate and bad luck are facts that are often used to ignore our responsibilities. Again, it is necessary to start looking at ourselves from a different perspective by thinking, "What did I do to bring this situation to me?" instead of "What happened to us?" What your wife did not do
Let's leave aside what your mother-in-law and father-in-law did
Most importantly, let's stop complaining.
What did you do, what could you do and what can you do now? Asking these questions internally is essential for a person to fulfill his responsibility towards himself.
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