If you have the Punitiveness schema, some of the following explanations may sound very familiar to you:
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If I make a mistake, I must be punished.
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If someone else makes a mistake, they should be punished.
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If I make a mistake, I am weak. Those who make mistakes are weak.
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If someone does something wrong, they should definitely be told.
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If I don't do my job properly, I must suffer the consequences.
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I get angry if people's bad behavior stays that way.
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I have a hard time forgiving and forgetting.
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I hold grudges.
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I blame myself harshly when I make a mistake.
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If someone does something wrong, I will tell them for sure.
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I keep thinking about the bad things people do, especially if they haven't paid the price.
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I have voices in my head that judge myself and other people.
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I have received feedback from people that I am overly critical/oppressive/judgmental.
If you have a punishment scheme, you may experience childhood experiences similar to the one below. you may have:
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My mom/dad would always tell me what I was doing wrong.
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My mom/dad would yell at me when I made a mistake, and punish me.
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When we were little, there was no room for mistakes in our house.
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My mom/dad used to say a lot about what was right and what was wrong. .
The imperfection/shame schema can be another origin.
How does the punishment schema affect your life?
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You are deprived of feelings such as fun, satisfaction, curiosity, peace.
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It is difficult to establish satisfactory relationships because you drive other people away with your punitiveness. Because it's almost like you're lurking in search of their faults.
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It's hard to relax and enjoy because you're too busy looking for faults. z.
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