Parents' attitudes have an important place in children's psychology. Sometimes, despite all good intentions, those undesirable wars and moments of crisis eventually break out. Trying to resolve the crisis, trying to talk, trying to calm down, etc. Behaviors can sometimes accelerate this negative situation. So, how should we approach the child in these moments of crisis? What can be done? This has no pill information because every child is different and unique. Every situation is unique. Children learn their physical characteristics by looking in the mirror. They learn to recognize their emotions by listening to the emotions reflected on them. They reflect what is seen as it is. When we have strong emotions, the presence of someone who listens and understands us is most important. A parent who guides a child who does not yet know or understand his emotions becomes an important support in his development process. In order for him to learn to control his anger in the future, we must first make him feel that we understand his feelings. At this point, it would be appropriate to mention Daniel Siegel's "Whole Brain Child" philosophy: Our mind has two sides. One side is related to emotions, the other side is related to logic. If we are in an emotional intensity and the other person comes to us with something logical, we push him back. So does the child. While he was in that intense emotional state, he said whatever he was angry about: “Yes, I understand. Right now, you are angry for such and such a reason. "When I was little, I felt the same way as you when it happened like this." Especially if we are talking about 0-3 years old, it is important that we reassure him at that moment and make him feel that we understand his feelings by establishing physical contact, speaking slowly, in a calm tone of voice, and trying to lower his mood by acting calmly.
The thing that should not be forgotten is that nothing done or said during a crisis will be effective. This can be described as a wave that cannot be avoided. After the tide has passed and the waters have calmed down a bit, the subject can be discussed depending on the child's age and emotional maturity. The emotions that the child is experiencing at that moment can be named (such as anger, disappointment, sadness) and the child can be helped to recognize his emotions and make sense of these emotions. What can be done in case of similar situations that may be encountered in the future The instructions can be reviewed together.
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