A person needs many things in order to survive. The first step of Abraham Maslow's hierarchy of needs is physical needs such as food, sleep and shelter. These are actually physical needs that every human being meets in order to survive. However, meeting physical needs alone is insufficient for a healthy life. Love, trust, appreciation and healthy attachment, which are among the most important requirements of a healthy life, are also needs and requirements.
How do we meet the needs of love, belonging, trust and healthy attachment besides physical needs?
Here, the importance of attachment theory, which started before birth and continued after, is of great importance. John Bowlby, the pioneer of attachment theory, defines attachment behavior as any behavior that an infant shows to its primary caregiver figure to establish and maintain the desired closeness to its mother. Attachment actually shows us that the mother is not just a tool to meet the child's needs in the child relationship. This bonding relationship with the mother, which is basically realized, has a great impact on the friendship, partner relationships and relationships that we will establish in the future, which are considered important in our social environment. Attachment has a great effect on an individual's sense of personal competence, developing a positive self-perception, and establishing secure relationships with his environment. A healthy attachment that cannot be established with the mother in the first years of life can also turn into a pathology that follows us with different effects in every period of our life such as childhood, adolescence and adulthood. Now I will tell you about the pathologies that may occur in this situation;
The first of these is reactive attachment disorder. In the first years of life, the inconsistent attachment of the caregiver to the mother and frequent changes of the caregiver bring along reactive attachment disorder in the following periods. In fact, the child experiences a conflict that he cannot resolve internally. However, in the future, an anxious attachment style may develop in the child. The child, who is anxious and restless when separated from the mother, does not calm down easily when he is united with the mother and does not do it to the mother. it shines. If I explain this with an example; Many parents make statements such as “my child does not want to go to school, he wants to play with me every time at home, he cannot act independently of me while playing with his friends in the park”. This is the result of anxious attachment. In the future, panic disorder, obsessive compulsive disorder, and social phobia are pathological conditions that often accompany them.
How do we ensure this secure attachment? And how can we prevent the occurrence of psychopathological conditions in the child in the future?
First of all, we can start by meeting the baby's need for love. The baby, who feels loved by the caregiver, actually develops a sense of trust in the caregiver and the mother. . Because bonding is a reciprocal process. And the more the mother feels the feeling of love and trust towards her baby, the more the baby feels towards her mother. The caregiver's physical touch, caress, and rhythmic movements to the baby are another factor that needs attention and practice that improves the bonding between the mother and the baby. In fact, in order to ensure a secure and healthy attachment, both the physical needs of the baby must be met, and love, belonging and making them feel valuable must be handled and applied together. When all these processes are considered, attachment; It is one of the important issues that affect the individual's mental process, social relations, and the development of self-structure.
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