Ways to Cope with Faulty Parents' Attitudes

Showing parental attitudes as one of the causes of psychiatric diseases may cause some adults to have hostile attitudes towards their parents and blame them for every disaster.

However, as it will not bring a solution to these problems, it may also prevent us from the positive energy of not making the mistakes made to us to the next generations.

Faulty Parental Attitudes;

• Overprotective attitude

• Over-oppressive-authoritarian attitude

• Neglecting parental attitude

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• Over-tolerant attitude

  Educating the parents, strengthening the social ties of the parents, improving the conditions of the parents, providing counseling services, family therapy, individual therapy, etc. It may be possible to accept and implement the role of healthy parents again with methods determined according to the needs of individuals.

  As a result, preventive health services in psychiatry should not be neglected. Efforts should be made to raise public awareness about faulty and inappropriate parental attitudes.

  Showing parental attitudes as one of the causes of psychiatric diseases may cause some adults to have hostile attitudes towards their parents and blame them for every disaster.

  However, as it will not bring a solution to these problems, it may also prevent us from the positive energy of not making the mistakes made to us to the next generations.

  Faulty Parental Attitudes;

  • Overprotective attitude

  • Over-oppressive-authoritarian attitude

  • Neglecting parental attitude

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  • Over-tolerant attitude

  • Double impasse

  • Double standards

  There are generally three types of reactions in children raised with excessive pressure and strict discipline. :

  1 . The child's intimidation, appearing extremely docile and obedient,

  2. To openly oppose and rebel against all kinds of authority,

  To cower completely where there is pressure, fear and threat, to rebel in the presence of those with whom he feels comfortable and who treat him gently and moderately

  Neglecting Parents' Attitude:

  types of neglect;

  • Not paying attention to the child's health,

  • Rejecting or delaying daily care,

  • Not providing guidance,

  • Abandoning,

  • Not providing a suitable home environment,

  • Not protecting from risks and diseases at home,

  • Not paying attention to his nutrition, not paying attention to his education,

  • Not paying attention when he shows problem behaviors,

  • Emotional Not making the child feel wanted and loved,

  Direct signs of neglect:

  • Dirty and neglect

  Indirect symptoms:

  • Growth retardation,

  • Frequent illness,

  • Nutrition disorder

  • Physical and mental developmental delay.

  • Delay in language development

  Over-Pressure-Authoritarian Attitude:

  • Child does not participate in the parent's conversations

  • The mother often acts as a buffer in communication with the father

  • The mother or father usually gives evasive answers to surprise/critical questions

  • The child is not allowed to speak badly about the teacher

  • The child is not allowed to be angry with the parents

  • If too much closeness is shown towards the child, it is thought that the child will have a weak character

  • The child is not allowed to question the decisions

  • The child cannot be friends with someone the parent deems inappropriate

  • If the child insists on this relationship, punishment will be applied

  • He cannot go to any of his friends' houses

  • He thinks that too much games and sports will affect the child's success in studies

  • It is not the child's He tries to enter the profession he deems appropriate

  • It is essential that the child knows where he is and what he is doing

  • What the child eats is closely related to how much he eats. takes care of

  • Teaches the child to always control his/her emotions

  • The child "should not have secrets that the parents do not know" thinks

  • He thinks that physical punishment is the best form of discipline

  Faulty Parents Reasons for Their Attitudes:

  • Agreement in marriage

  • Past experiences of parents

  • Characteristics of the child

  • Internal and external stress factors

  • Cultural values ​​of the societyi

  What Factors Create Healthy Families?

  • In these families, boundaries are determined and shared by the parents. There is leadership.

  • The mother is the leader in some areas of family life, and the father is the leader in others. The roles of mother and father are consistent and clear. Everyone has accepted these roles.

  • There is authority but there is no authoritarian behavior. Power is shared between the mother and father, and children know that the mother and father are in control.

  • In this type of family, even though there is closeness to each other, individuality is important and allowed.

  • Each family member is allowed to express his/her ideas and opinions, but openness is expected. In these families, where each member bears responsibility for his/her own thoughts and feelings, all emotions are expressed and reciprocated.

  • Everyone speaks only on their own behalf and does not exceed their limits by speaking on behalf of others.

  • Family members respect each other.

  It is not the number of rules, but their content that is important. Parents setting reasonable, logical rules and applying these rules in a consistent and affectionate manner develops respect for authority, which is an important feature in the child.

  • Rules must have value. Parents should not make rules that they do not believe in. If parents cannot defend the rules they set, they lose their value.

  • Rules must have a purpose. The purpose of the rules should be to help the child develop behaviors that will enable him to adapt to his environment and society.

  • Rules should be clearly stated.

  • The number of rules should be limited.

  • Children will test the rules.

  • Parents must be true to their word.

  • Punishment It must be appropriate to the crime.

  Democratic Attitude:

  • The child can express his/her own opinion during the parent's speech,

  • The child can easily express his/her thoughts at home without fear of pressure from the parents,

  • The child can ask questions about sexuality, God, and criticisms about the order in the country and school. He can voice it at home.

  • Parents respect the child's views and encourage him to express his views

  • When making plans for the family. usually learns the children's preferences and takes this into consideration

  • The child chooses his/her own friends,

  • In case of a relationship that is not appropriate for the parent the child is talked to,

  • If the child insists on a relationship that is deemed inappropriate, the reasons for this insistence are investigated together,

  • The parent tries to get to know the child's friends,

  • Activities with the child and his/her friends.

  • The child determines the tempo of work and play by himself.

  • The family supports the child's initiatives regarding his own education

  • Assigns tasks and family responsibilities to the child,

  • When he gets into trouble, he expects him to solve the problem himself as much as he can.

  • It encourages the child to be curious, to research, to ask questions,

  • It controls the child by warning him of bad things that may happen to him

  • The child decides what suits him/herself,

  • Allows the child to make many decisions himself

  • Things the child tries or achieves It lets the child know that you appreciate him/her,

  • He knows that it is better to reward the child when he is good than to punish him when he is bad.

   

• Double stalemate

• Double standards