Couples therapy is a form of therapy that helps couples understand and solve various problems and blockages in their relationships and improve their relationship. In couple therapy, the aim is for couples to establish safe and healthy relationships with each other, resolve conflicts, reconcile differences and gain healthy discussion skills.
When working with couples, no fault or culprit is sought. A couples therapist is not a lawyer or a judge. It does not decide who is right and who is wrong. In couple therapy, it is ensured that both parties take responsibility for solving the existing problem. The couples therapist tries to understand why couples feel feelings of injustice. It makes both parties feel safe and understood. It helps couples understand each other's psychological needs.
According to research, disease rates of happy couples decrease and their immune systems are strengthened. Couples who find happiness in their relationships have longer lives. In a couple relationship, it is very important for the spouses to make an effort and care for their relationship, considering the intention of being happy and staying happy, in order for that relationship to be healthy. When the relationship is not given due attention, each couple, especially the children, is negatively affected, and these effects last for many years. When the stress hormone cortisone is constantly released, the possibility of serious diseases such as heart and cancer increases. Depression is also frequently seen.
The problems that couples usually experience are as follows;
*Lack of communication
*Cheating or cheating
*Extreme jealousy or distrust
*Feeling of being treated unfairly
*Intense and hurtful arguments
*Indifference
*Sexual problems
*Request for divorce
*Problems arising from the couples' own families
* Anger outbursts
Various couple therapies such as "Emotion-focused couple therapy", "Imago couple therapy", "Gottman Couple therapy", "PACT couple therapy (psycho-biological approach)" are applied in the psychological support of couples. There are approaches. The PACT model, which is mainly used in our center, is applied by our couple therapy psychologist Zerrin Gündüz. Zerrin Gün Düz explains PACT therapy as follows:
“According to this approach, the partner is an object of attachment. People who have problems with secure attachment experience more problems in their relationships. The main goal when working with couples is to help couples establish a relationship in which they feel safe by reducing their triggering of each other.
In the PACT approach, the therapist starts from the following foundations;
1 - Couples They should be each other's experts.
2 - Couples should be the first people they turn to in life.
3 - Couples who know each other should know how to please and calm each other.
4- Couples whose daily lives are busy should be able to stay in touch. sleeping and waking up, welcoming and sending off rituals should be created.
5- Couples should be able to manage the third parties in their lives that are outside the "couple bubble" such as work, children, their own family and friends, and they should feel that the priority is always their partner and make their partner feel this.
6- Couples should be able to rekindle love at any time by making frequent eye contact.
7- Couples should create a discussion environment where they can compromise instead of trying to cover up the problem because they avoid discussing the problems they experience.
8- Couples can reduce each other's stress and improve their health.
9- Couples should consult each other when making decisions on important or current issues such as having children, moving to another city, going on vacation.
10- The inability of couples to empathize due to the personality structure of the other, visually visualizing the changes in their partner. It should be supported in understanding and compensating for deficiencies such as not being able to notice them.”
Couple therapy is a service that can be received at every stage of marriage. In particular, receiving support before problems escalate prevents problems and crises that may arise in the future. Just as early diagnosis and treatment of diseases saves lives, early intervention and prevention of problems in marriages can prevent traumatic events that may be difficult to continue and repair and may end in divorce. Sometimes relationships that cannot continue may need to end. The couple therapist may have to provide support in ending the relationship in a healthy way.
During the preparation process for marriage, it is very useful to receive premarital counseling services in order to prevent future crises and to establish the marriage on healthy foundations. The first years of marriage are risky periods as spouses are in the process of getting to know each other and adapting. If a marriage is damaged during these years, it becomes more difficult to repair the relationship. Talking about possible problems in advance and getting counseling about the marriage process and establishing a healthy relationship minimizes the risk.
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