Adolescence is a transition period in which one leaves childhood and steps into adulthood.
Contrary to popular belief, adolescence is generally a healthy process. The incidence of the problem is approximately .
The role of the family is the main area of intervention in the areas of autonomy, identity development, cognitive, emotional and moral development experienced during adolescence.
When does adolescence begin?
Biologically, it begins with puberty.
Menstruation in girls, deepening of voice and increased hair growth in boys can be considered as the beginning signs of puberty.
To communicate with the adolescent…
· Let your child know that you are interested in his/her needs and that you will help him/her when needed.
· When your child wants to talk to you, you can turn off the television, put away the newspaper, and look at him/her. You can take care to communicate eye to eye….
· When you are given important news, respond with a sincerely warm expression, considering the positive and negative effects…
· When there is an important issue that he wants to talk about with you, he can talk to you in environments where there are no others. Talk to him… do not tell his secrets to anyone without his permission….
· Be careful not to criticize his behavior and aspects that you do not like in a way that will humiliate him in front of others….
· While listening to him, try not to interrupt him as much as possible…. do not try to complete it…..
· While describing a particular situation or event, criticize it without straying from the main idea of the event…
For example, when explaining that others hit him, "why weren't you studying at that time?" Words cause him to misinterpret events and feel meaningless emotions.
· Be careful to ask "what" questions rather than "why"...
for example, what happened? ? What do you think?
· Do not use insulting, degrading words...
· When talking to him, prefer the tone of voice and words you use with adults...
· He is small and inexperienced. Reminding words and addresses disrupt healthy communication...
· Be consistent... Don't let your words contradict your actions... Also, over time and inconsistent
Do not have expectations... Inconsistency ends trust and communication...
· Of course, first of all, be an example....
Teach by doing... Not with dry words, but with body. with your language….
· Choose times when you are calm and rested, not times of conflict, to talk and solve problems…
· Ask for his opinion when making decisions that concern him. However, tell them in advance that your word will be valid for attitudes that are diametrically opposed to you and that you cannot change.
· Having daily routines for the family is often protective….for example, eating at the same time every day….going to bed at the same time… .
When you aim for him to implement a behavior, you can prepare an action plan…
For example, limiting school absences to 5 days may be a clear goal..
'listening to his mother's words' Goals such as 'not to anger his father' or 'not to lie' are not clear. Not applicable..
· Put the goals and implementation elements in writing as much as possible and agree on them…
· Set realistic and applicable goals.. Stand behind the goals you set…
· Make sure that the plan has various flexibility. For example, making the right to absenteeism a 'zero day' or banning TV for a week are not realistic goals...
· Another of the important mistakes that have broken communication in recent years is "overly democratic family" ' are their attitudes.
We are a democratic family….we do whatever our child wants….we are like friends with him/her…we should not confuse democracy with indiscipline.
Adolescence should not be perceived as a difficult process to manage. With appropriate parental attitudes, you can achieve a happy and healthy family structure and turn your child into someone who contributes to family integrity, rather than a problematic individual.
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