We are familiar with the sentence we have heard recently: "I couldn't get electricity." When we can't feel attraction, what we try to express politely with electricity is that we can't find what we're looking for in the other party, they don't impress us, and they don't even fit our criteria lists. So, on what basis did we create and transform this list of criteria?
It was formed and shaped according to the people in our previous relationships and the qualities with which we can live our ideals. While old relationships, especially old relationships, teach us what we like/dislike and want/want in the formation of certain patterns and criteria, they can also have unexplained reasons in some cases. In particular, what we seek from the other party are the qualities that we either feel we lack and need, or the qualities that will take us to our ideal self. While we create our criteria for the situations we call "this is my style", the way these criteria are formed has a great impact on the people who come into our lives. In other words, after a certain period of one's life, a person can say that he only likes dark-skinned people or only blue-eyed people. Tall people, people with earrings, tattoos, people wearing suits or people with curly hair, the list can go on and on. He can explain this situation in terms of criteria or style. However, what we call love at first sight can be related to people from our past lives. It is a difficult process to realize whose combination these features are and what they reflect. Especially the person who thinks he fell in love at first sight may not be aware that he is actually busy finding something similar to his past.
Because every person is afraid of what he does not know and has more confidence in what he knows. The repetitive and habitual place is our safe space. For example, if you have never had surgery in your life, you may be extremely afraid because you may be in extra fear of the unknown since you have never experienced many situations such as how much pain it will cause you or how your body will handle it. However, when the surgery was performed for the second time, the fear decreased and you can understand that this was due to knowledge and experience. Just like our love life. We can prefer the features we are used to and know over the good and bad we do not know. And by calling it love at first sight... What we call love at first sight is a thing of the past. It means noticing a safe space that we know and recognize in the person we see for the first time. While this may be more of a physical reflection, it is also possible to catch it from a tone of voice, a facial expression or a behavior. The person we meet for the first time and to whom we feel attracted without even knowing has unknowingly conveyed to us a resemblance of someone from the past, and we trust what we know and feel warmth towards him/her. However, while changing its name, the unconscious does not always bring this reflection to the surface of consciousness. That's why we try to clarify things with expressions such as being electrified or impressed, just my style. Even though we may not be aware of this logical similarity, the description of being attracted to a person we do not know in any way, with whom we have never spent time, and of experiencing intense feelings, is related to the fact that he/she carries a part of us from our past. The brain can match that piece very quickly and make the person experience intense emotions. However, the downside of love at first sight is that it is affected even by characteristics that may have a negative impact on the person. In other words, if a person's past life included a rude male model in their family life or macho characters dominated their relationship history, this is a safe space for the person. In other words, it is an area that he knows and repeats. So it's not that this person suddenly falls in love with the behavior of a very polite man; It is normal to feel love at first sight for someone who speaks harsh words or looks tough. Because that's what he knows and knows. Therefore, the reason why we prefer the happiness we do not know to the unhappiness we do know can be explained in this way. We tend towards what we know, good or bad. Everything we don't know is scarier because people are afraid of what they don't know.
Love at first sight needs to be experienced with healthier and more logical emotions. For this reason, you should be considerate of people you don't know but have intense feelings for at the first meeting. You should question who these people were like in your past life, what emotions they made you feel, and who else you felt this emotion in. Therefore, for a healthy relationship, you should get to know your love at first sight without rushing, your feelings should be re-evaluated over time, and instead of putting the person in a fixed mold, you should also ask yourself to discover their distinctive aspects. You should give it a chance.
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