The only constant thing is change. Sometimes new things can be exciting, sometimes they can be scary. While sometimes happiness is the only thing we feel with our whole body and being, sometimes we are filled with deep worries. When all these come together, the lack of control and helplessness felt can negatively affect functionality in daily life. At these times, it may be good to take a deep breath and think. Perhaps it is the best time to evaluate things.
While the feeling of lack of control and helplessness may motivate some for this change, it may be demotivating for others. Of course, it is very valuable to talk and think about the issues that are wanted to change, both on our own and through individual psychotherapy. Being able to share the desired subject without worrying about being judged or understood is one of the most powerful forces that can initiate change. In individual psychotherapy, the individual can express himself comfortably in the safe therapy environment created and consider different alternatives together with his therapist. However, sometimes, different things may be needed in change. Let's proceed with the swimming example. What is needed for swimming? A suitable swimsuit, towel, swimming knowledge, supportive armband or bagel if we are not good at swimming, etc. This list of needs can be shorter or longer depending on preferences. Let's say we organize the list according to our needs. We are ready to swim. And we came to the shores of the sea/pool. While jumping into the water to swim with all this preparation can sometimes be very easy, sometimes it is difficult. With the preparations, we may feel like we are stuck on the shore and start questioning: So, what happened now?
Just like preparing for swimming, change is a process in itself. There is always the possibility that this process will be long. In individual therapies, the relationship established between the client and the therapist during the process is very important. However, there are things that may be even more important, and reflecting on them is useful in making sense of the process. These are: Motivation, Desire and Volunteering. While it is not entirely wrong to start the change process without talking about these, starting the process without talking about them may cause some disruptions in the future.
When change is desired, the following questions can help illuminate the way:
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How motivated are you for change?
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How much do you want change?
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This change /how much can you volunteer for changes?
Questions are important. The answers are important. Being honest in the answers and accepting them is very valuable. While trying to find answers to these questions through individual therapies, people can gain new perspectives on their individual struggles. Individuals can find coping methods that suit them and improve their psychological resilience.
Remember that change requires courage at some point. We may all want many things to change in our lives, but only some of us can take courageous steps for this.
Hoping you will take a courageous step towards change.
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